Disappeared

I recently commented on how I didn't understand why so many people had disappeared from the platform - and then, lo and behold, I disappeared for a while myself. Indeed, the reasons for something like this can be numerous and varied, it’s not just a matter of one or two causes that one might automatically assume to be the most likely.

First, there was this unavoidable stress at work. Then I went on vacation - a time when I usually want to rest by completely disconnecting from everything associated with my daily routine.
Then I returned from that vacation to the familiar sh&tshow and... I got sick. I’m still sick. I came down with something - a cold, the flu, a viral infection - in a strange and mysterious way, it’s the kind of illness I haven't had in all these covid years.

But here I am now, sick. I can’t gather my thoughts, I’m constantly sleepy, and I’m not productive at anything, I can’t even manage routine housework like vacuuming, yet I still have to work.

When I speak of "unavoidable stress," I’m not sure if it’s truly unavoidable. The fact is, it happens inevitably, no matter how senseless or illogical it may be, it is an inescapable part of life on this chaotic planet.

I was singled out, along with the other top performer on our project, by a member of the company’s direct management in the country we work for. We were targeted to be singled out, our names were repeatedly dragged through the mud in front of all our colleagues, painting us as people who had done something wrong, people who had made mistakes or engaged in some sort of misconduct (while being the top quality performers).
In principle, such actions are prohibited by law in the corporate world of the country I’m referring to - the one we work for. Yet, apparently, the rules don't apply when it comes to foreign nationals working within that corporate system.
My name was linked to things I had absolutely nothing to do with, but I had no way to defend myself. No one wanted to listen, and the old issue was raised again - why I’m so emotional and why I take everything so personally (because it is personal, damn it).

Amidst all this chaos and stress, the two of us actually got promoted at the Bulgarian company where I work - lol, it’s totally schizophrenic! And then, right after returning from my wonderful vacation, I got sick coming back to this same sh&tshow - I think you would understand me. Actually, it even took me a while to realize myself why I’d fallen ill and why working is so hard for me right now. Yet, I had to work.

The time before last that I went on vacation this year - which was right before my birthday - a colleague passed away during the week leading up to my leave.
A colleague passed away completely unexpectedly. One day he worked until the end of the shift, and the next, he was gone. A young man in his thirties, with no signs of illness or anything else. They didn't actually tell us what happened, in fact, they forbade us from talking about it, so I drew my own conclusions based on what I knew for myself.

I am well aware that if anyone saw this written down, I would be fired. Of course, I wouldn't share where I work anywhere - not even on LinkedIn (though I realize many of you know my real name anyway and I have no idea how that happened). So, what are the chances of a company actually discovering its employees' blog accounts? (Oh, how I wish Steemit required registration for access and was closed off to the outside world!)

Anyway, as I said, I can't gather my thoughts; I'm sleepy, and I need to prepare - mentally and physically - for tomorrow, which is coming in a second or two. I think too many things have piled up that I can't process, and the fact that I've fallen ill makes me feel even more vulnerable, I don't feel myself at all. Perhaps I want to remind those who still don't get it what a nightmare it is to live in this country. I recently read about yet another foreign family that was duped into coming to live in this "wonderful" country - lol. It takes them years to realize the truth about the scam known as the healthcare system, for instance. And what about the corporate world? I don't want to go into the details right now regarding the death of my colleague, who was so young... Just wish me luck. I don't feel myself right now, sorry..

Thank you for your time! Copyright:	@soulsdetour
	Soul's Detour is a project started by me years ago when I had a blog about historical and not so popular tourist destinations in Eastern Belgium, West Germany and Luxembourg. Nowadays, this blog no longer exists, but I'm still here - passionate about architecture, art and mysteries and eager to share my discoveries and point of view with you.

Personally, I am a sensitive soul with a strong sense of justice.
Traveling and photography are my greatest passions.
Sounds trivial to you?
No, it's not trivial. Because I still love to travel to not so famous destinations.🗺️
Of course, the current situation does not allow me to do this, but I still find a way to satisfy my hunger for knowledge, new places, beauty and art.
Sometimes you can find the most amazing things even in the backyard of your house.😊🧐🧭|